Emotional Fear (as opposed to the pure feeling of Fear that serves us) is the energy that is stored/stuck in the body from the zillion times it showed up and was shoved straight back down again; not listened to, not heard and hence not completed.
Intellectually I’ve known about the emotional Fear I’ve had stored away.
Energetically I’ve even felt surges of it rise but as soon as it reached a certain point I would jump into my head and express it via stories – explaining it away.
Then Anger would come - the Warrioress - to protect and create boundaries so I didn’t have to feel the depth of this Fear.
The mind fueled stories of Fear would blame and cut-off from whatever or whom ever was connecting me to this experience that felt too big for me to bare.
Small tremors moved me physically, eyes wide open, tears flowing, and a high pitched sound at times. This is what emotional Fear looks like as it begins to move.
It didn’t last long. Allowing emotional energy to move never does, contrary to what we fear may happen if we let these ancient energies right in, taking up the space they need.
Through our work with feelings I know all of this. I’ve even been guided in to Fear processes, however my experience this morning was from a depth that I didn’t realise existed.
This was Fear that I'd hidden at the bottom of the well in the depths of my heart. There was a dull pressure in my physical heart space where it felt like it was cracking through.
This fragile and ferocious Fear was so deeply unconscious… until now.
It was such a relief to feel this old Fear, to invite it in and to let it go. It transformed the connection I was in with Gero in that moment exponentially. I shifted from talking about my Fear of what ‘might’ happen (through an tone of contempt and blame towards Gero)…
…to simply allowing, feeling and receiving the information within where I could see that it was old shaky Fear stuck in my body that was speaking (not the present adult me).
Once it was felt, complete and moved on, I moved on to love and connection (both energetically and physically which was beautiful).
This is how quickly our states can change through listening to what needs to be heard.
Old stuck emotional energy just needs to be heard and once it is it is complete. It will keep finding experiences for us that call it up until we are prepared to listen; with our body and not just our mind.
In my experience – the body never lies.
This is such an initiation for me on a whole other level as Gero and I are about to step into offering our first Embracing Fear workshop this coming Friday night & Saturday. I love how life serves me like this. For others it may be different however for me I put out an offering that feels like the next natural step and if there is any part of me that isn’t quite in alignment I inevitably am offered an experience to step right in… and here it is.
Soon after this experience I went with Gero to an ecstatic dance - I felt different. Later in the day, I noticed my connection to the pure feeling of Fear – intuition, sensory guidance, insight – was stronger.
When I clear the old emotionally charged energy I create more space in which to access the gifts of pure and present feeling energy.
These gifts arrive when I activate (or stellate in Possibility Management language) the pure archetypal feeling of Fear and I meet the Sorceress/Magician within.
She is arriving…